It’s a trip to the London stadium to begin this week, where I was the only player to predict a draw for the ‘ammers against Liverpool. It’s all rather falling apart for Klopp at the end. As you’d expect, Liverpool had loads of decent chances, but the whole team seemed to come down with a touch of the Darwin Nunezes. Antoine, Damo, Ian, Lawro, Rob and Rod all correctly called a draw between Fulham and Palace. Palace are looking pretty decent these days, and what a goal from Schlupp too. Ian and Lawro got the 1-1 score exactly right.

It’s the Theatre of Dangnation next, with nobody predicting a draw between Burnley and Man Utd. I was putting the rubbish out at 2.57pm, and walking back home, I watched a clip on twitter of Ian Dennis talking to Pat Nevin, who was very positive about Burnley, which had me frantically changing my prediction to a Burnley win at 2.59pm. Never mind. Apparently Kenny Cunningham also predicted a 4-3 win for Burnley, so I was in esteemed company with that wrong prediction. Not much to report here other than Man U being their usual hilariously shit selves. New contract for Ten Hag, please. Ellman’s banker went south on a Man Utd win. It’s the only clean sweep of the week as everyone rightly predicted a win for Newcastle over Sheff U. A microcosm of their season: look really good in patches, score a calamitous own goal, get battered, get relegated. Jez banked on the 5-1 for an Alexander Isak signs for Arsenal-tastic +21, with Lawro also getting the correct score.

Damo and Lawro were the only ones not to predict a win for Wolves over Luton. Fair shout, Wolves have been shite lately, but a couple of returning lads had them looking half decent again. Antoine, Ed, me, Miki and Rod all got the 2-1 score spot on. Dave, Ed, Ellman, Ian and me all correctly went for an Everton win over Brentford. About as much quality as you’d expect in the “both safe from relegation lower mid-table” derby. Ed got the 1-0 score bang on.

Jez was the only player to predict a draw in the Villa-Chelsea game, getting the 2-2 exactly right. Lads, you need to stop taking a 2 goal lead, it’s gonna be the fucking death of you. I can understand letting Gallagher take that shot for the equaliser, he’s your textbook 1 in 1000 man from attempts like that. VAR, well, what can you do. I think it is a foul, but it’s one of those they usually let go. But, it’s Chelsea, so haaaa. Damo, Dave, Ed, Ellman, Jez, Matt and Rod all correctly predicted a win for Bournemouth over Brighton. Can you have a “South coast derby” between two teams 96 miles apart? Probably not. Brighton have fallen off a cliff. (A rock? Does that work? Probably not). Jez was closest with a 2-0 prediction.

Damo, Ed, Ian, me and Rob all failed to predict a win for Arsenal over Spurs. Look, I’m not saying Raya is on the take, I’m not saying that at all. Did you notice how he dived out of the way for the offside goal? And then “accidentally” gave the ball away and dived out of the way for the first Spurs goal? WHAT THE FUCK IS THAT? WHY ARE YOU DIVING OUT OF THE WAY? Sorry, it was insane. That game was stone cold dead until David “Jesus” Raya decided to resurrect it by being a total fuckwit. Shitarse. Anyway. Apart from feeling like I wanted to vomit for the final 30 minutes, I suppose we did alright. Dave got the 3-2 score exactly right.

And finally, Lawro was the only player not to predict a win for Man City over Forest. Keep the faith! Damo banked on the 2-0 for a Peptacular +14.

Nasser Hussein’s shot of the day AKA “we almost paid £80m for this”:

Wrong week of the week: Me putting the first 3 matches of the week as draws in week 34. It was this week, goddammit.

Week 35 table (changes from week 29 part 2): Antoine makes up some ground on Rob at the top, but time’s against him for a “Paddywack” style comeback at the death (it’s from when I used to watch horse racing…never mind). Jez storms into mid-table with the week’s high score, but the battle for 7^th (© Formula 1 racing) is really hotting up. Miki is off the bottom at the expense of Lawro.