So, with 48 days to go, let’s review England’s 4th highest scorer of all time with 48 goals. But, for brevity’s sake, let’s just look at the final 9 goals.
Goal 40: 25 May, 1991 – England vs Argentina, 1991 England Challenge Cup
An idea conceived of before the FA had a dedicated marketing department, can be the only explanation I can think of for the most middle-aged white man sounding tournament in history.
A young David Batty winning his first England cap is featured in the pre-match line-up chat by Motson. He gets fouled by an also-young Diego Simeone in a weird precursor of France ’98-related shenangians. The subsequent free-kick, just inside England’s half, is taken by Stuart Pearce and it’s a long ball into the penalty area. It hangs for an age before landing on a somehow unmarked Lineker’s head 8 yards out, who executes a diving, glancing header beyond the keeper to open the scoring. It’s tremendously simple stuff, but a very well taken goal nonetheless.
Goal 41: 3 June, 1991 – New Zealand vs England, Friendly
There’s a real feeling that the 1991 shorts were left behind when the team flew out on tour, and all they could find were the 1985 shorts, such is the level of budgie-smuggling going on here. Also, there’s a beautiful athletics track surrounding the pitch/grass hill with spectators on behind the goal combo, that you just don’t see enough of in high-level internationals these days.
Dennis Wise misses a chance and then trudges back looking every inch the scolded child. John Salako hits the bar. Earl Barrett! It’s the 93rd minute and Motson and Brooking have given up. But wait! Paul Parker puts in a low cross and Lineker steals in ahead of the keeper to flick it home. Motson says, “It all seemed lost…the chance of a win, that is.” Well, drawing with New Zealand feels like a loss.
Goals 42-45: 12 June 1991 – Malaysia vs England, Friendly
Must be one of the last outings of the “Commentator on the phone” trope before the technology took over.
England have a free kick in the first minute. Its swung in but partially cleared, eventually coming to Geoff Thomas, who feeds a simple ball to Lineker, who then rifles home with his left foot.
Pearce loops in a corner. Mark Wright flicks it on and Lineker stabs it home from about 2 yards. Easy.
There’s a calamitous attempt to play it out from the back that gets intercepted by Geoff Thomas, who again plays a simple pass to Lineker, but the shot from the edge of the box is parried. It falls to David Platt on the right, who chips it into the near post for Lineker to head home.
Platt misses from 15 yards with a spectacular bicycle kick. Pearce’s cross misses Platt’s head in the box but runs on to John Salako. The keeper rushes out and it’s the simplest job for Salako to chip it in and Lineker heads into an empty net.
46: 13 November 1991 – Poland vs England, Euro ’92 qualifier
A crucial qualifier and a hostile environment in Poznan. Andy Gray (not that one) misses a great chance. Barry McGuigan opens the scoring for Poland. Geoff Thomas misses a great chance to equalise. Poland are denied a stonewall penalty when Chris Woods brings down the Polish chap who beats him to the ball. VAR is weeping at that one. I wonder if there’s some Polish blogger ranting about this? Godspeed, my friend.
Rocastle swings in a corner. It’s headed down by Gary Mabbutt, and Lineker volleys it on the turn into the top corner. Brilliant goal!
47: 19 February 1992 – England vs France, Friendly
“Alan Shearer of Southampton” scores on his debut. Geoff Thomas with that miss. In what feels like an inter-generational singularity, Shearer crosses for Nigel Clough, whose shot is parried, only for Lineker to head home at the 2nd attempt. Persistence pays off.
48: 29 April 1992 – CIS vs England, Friendly
Martin Tyler proves my earlier prediction wrong by phoning it in from Moscow for Sky Sports. Tony Daley battles down the right, swings one in and Lineker heads home. Routine as you like. “Surely Bobby Charlton’s mark will fall to him,” observes Tyler. Surely.
Not 49: 17 May 1992 – England vs Brazil, Friendly
Oh, Gary!
Today’s feeling: Out in the groups. Harry Kane retires from international football on 52 goals after trying to head in a penalty vs Iran.