Easy Hater

You have to admire Christiano Ronaldo’s recent response to an evening of Croatian insults. I mean, ‘I’m rich, handsome and a great player.’ At least it reassures the world those nasty Zagreb fans haven’t dented his precious confidence. But is he right? Let’s have a look.

1) Yeah he’s got a few quid, something to the tune of the (alleged) $38 million he earned in 2010. Certainly not to be sniffed at; 2) Handsome? Well, that’s more difficult for me, a paragon of heterosexuality, to give an opinion on this but, yeah – I’ll admit he has a certain oily charm. But then, so does a bag of chips, but ok, I’ll give him a tick here too. 3) Is he a great player? Well…yes, he is. He is a massively wealthy, good-looking arrogant man. I mean really, really, really arrogant…but yeah, lets face it – he’s a great footballer.

So what’s that, er… three-nil to Mr Ronaldo, the hat trick, the old three for three. Turns out that he is indeed rich, handsome and a great player. A kind of adonis of a human being, a glowing example of footballing achievement. But is this the sole explanation of why he is oh so easy to hate?

Actually, yes. Very much so. You see, with your average football fan, you can find the perfect microcosm of the human animal at large. And that animal at it’s petty heart, despite all protests to the contrary, is of course a jealous, jealous thing. Yeah, of course we dislike you for your success, and yeah of course its our flaws and not your brilliance that’s the problem. Its just…do you have to be such a dick with it?

An Englishman abroad

Liverpool to Lille, “I raised an eyebrow,” Joe coolly explained. As well he might. Bench-warmer to playmaker, and that’s playmaker at the French Champions, playmaker in the Champions League. It’s a good move, Joe. I’d lower those eyebrows.

But how can he be sure it’s not going to be a case of out of sight, out of mind? Is this really the best way to get back into the thinking of Mr Capello? (I’m assuming Mr Capello will be too lazy to take the hour and a half train from Kings Cross to Lille; he still hasn’t quite mastered the English language, so…) All I’m really saying is, he could have gone to Tottenham, QPR, even Villa – might that not have been, I don’t know a bit…safer?

It was probably the fact that these three wouldn’t meet the alleged £90,000 per week wage demands made by Cole and his entourage, that saw the crafty cockney (can i use that, or has Eric Bristow copyrighted it?) hot footing it to his local Euro Star. But what must be considered as well, in the (admittedly mandatory sycophantic) unveiling press conference Cole spoke of having always wanted to play abroad. He also stressed his admiration for the French Champions style of football; they’re like Barcelona apparently.

So maybe I should suspend my cynicism and applaud the move as a brave and innovative way of coming in from the international cold. So good luck to him. And if all goes well maybe we’ll see other international rejects taking a similar approach to resurrecting their England careers. Heskey to Marseille? Wayne Bridge to Olympiakos? Joey Barton…I don’t know…somewhere in Turkey?

Best man for the job?

After this week’s news that clubs may be forced to interview black candidates for vacant managerial positions, 30 yard sniper looks at racism in football management.

Kicking racism out of football management is something I feel strongly about, but the ‘I’ is not the ‘I’ that supports and admires the message of the ‘Kick It Out’ campaign, but rather the shamelessly selfish one that wants my team to win, to be managed by the best available.

Charlton Athletic Football Club should stand as something of an example; they are, after all, one of only two English League Clubs to currently employ a black manager. The point of this is not to aggrandise my club for being on the right side of a shameful fact, but to show the decision to appoint Powell for what it was: a good football decision by an astute board.

Following on from the colossal dynasty left behind by Alan Curbishley, the decision makers at Charlton were left with a hard job. Who ever they appointed would inherit a poisoned chalice that would be passed around a string of unfortunate bosses.

Firstly, in May 2006, Iain Dowie was appointed. A hard working, respected ex-pro, renowned as something of a thinker for a footballer (he has a degree in rocket science, or something along those lines), and who at the time was still broadly thought of as a promising young manager. All of these things are all well and good. But as a former player and manager of local rivals Crystal Palace, he had no affinity to our club, he had no real proven track record in Premier League management, or keeping teams up whilst there. I don’t think it came as much of a surprise to the majority of Charlton fans when he was sacked twelve league games later with only two wins to his name.

Anyway this isn’t the time to list and evaluate everything that came between Curbishley and Powell (I’d quite happily do it, but…) Lets say managers came and then they went. Some had management pedigree (Pardew), some understood what the club was about (Parkinson and Kinsella) but none had that particular magic formula that makes a certain manager work at a certain club.

After the defeat on penalties to Swindon in the semi-finals of the play-offs (this was a very dark time, as you can imagine adjusting to the thought of playing a third season in the third tier of English football must have been), new owners were required, a new direction; something new and fresh was needed.

This is what Slater, Varney and Murray (Chairman, Executive Vice Chairman and Director respectively) did, what was so important for my football club. They thought about exactly what was needed, and didn’t just cast their line in to an overstocked pond to pull out whatever they hooked, ready to chuck it back the moment it began to flap uncomfortably about (you’ll notice I have a penchant for overextending fishing metaphors, wonder where I get that from…)

The result of this careful deliberation was Powell. At the time Slater said,

   ‘As soon as we met Chris, it was clear he was the stand out candidate.’

And that the point isn’t it – they gave him the chance to impress in an interview, he did, they followed through and gave him the job, and now they’re supporting him and his vision for the club. They facilitated a summer spree that saw 16 new arrivals at The Valley (importantly, Chris Powell signings). The results have been immediate.

Now, of course I am aware that football makes us all look an ass from time to time. So if the results take a downturn seeing Powell sacked by Christmas, then what?

Hopefully it will be seen for football reasons, Charlton can move on, and so can Chris Powell (having proved himself an articulate, insightful and charismatic boss – which he is by the way). It is an area of concern, though, seeing as black managers do seem short on the second and third chances most need to find their feet in such a tough profession (Ince, Barnes). The football management industry is overcrowded and massively competitive (even the Paulo Di Canio’s of this world having to start at Swindon).

All football clubs take advantaqe of the abundance and diversity of the playing talent on offer. So when it comes to choosing a manager, clubs should cast their nets high and wide (again, with the fishing, sorry). Don’t look to the same faces, which allows select few managers play swapsies with our clubs as they inch their way up the greasy pole. Such narrow thinking may not be borne of prejudice, but it is certainly as stupid.

When you want to hire a new manager, get everyone in to explain what they want for your club, what they can do for your club. Because if you are a Chairman and you’ve got someone in front of you enthusiastically explaining their vision, if this vision match your own hopes and dreams, then whatever colour they are won’t matter. If clubs are forced to interview black managers in order for this to happen, then that can only be a good thing.